the uncommercial traveller- 第28部分

appier　times　and　hare　this　calamity　fell　upon　me　I　made　for　my

amusement　when　I　little　thought　that　I　should　ever　need　it

excepting　for　my　air　this'　…　here　the　well…spoken　young　man　put　his

hand　into　his　breast　…　'this　comb！　　Sir　I　implore　you　in　the　name

of　charity　to　purchase　a　tortoiseshell　comb　which　is　a　genuine

article　at　any　price　that　your　humanity　may　put　upon　it　and　may　the

blessings　of　a　ouseless　family　awaiting　with　beating　arts　the

return　of　a　husband　and　a　father　from　Dover　upon　the　cold　stone

seats　of　London…bridge　ever　attend　you　Sir　may　I　take　the　liberty

of　speaking　to　you　I　implore　you　to　buy　this　comb！'　　By　this　time；

being　a　reasonably　good　walker；　you　will　have　been　too　much　for　the

well…spoken　young　man；　who　will　stop　short　and　express　his　disgust

and　his　want　of　breath；　in　a　long　expectoration；　as　you　leave　him

behind。



Towards　the　end　of　the　same　walk；　on　the　same　bright　summer　day；　at

the　corner　of　the　next　little　town　or　village；　you　may　find　another

kind　of　tramp；　embodied　in　the　persons　of　a　most　exemplary　couple

whose　only　improvidence　appears　to　have　been；　that　they　spent　the

last　of　their　little　All　on　soap。　　They　are　a　man　and　woman；

spotless　to　behold　…　John　Anderson；　with　the　frost　on　his　short

smock…frock　instead　of　his　'pow；'　attended　by　Mrs。　Anderson。　　John

is　over…ostentatious　of　the　frost　upon　his　raiment；　and　wears　a

curious　and；　you　would　say；　an　almost　unnecessary　demonstration　of

girdle　of　white　linen　wound　about　his　waist　…　a　girdle；　snowy　as

Mrs。　Anderson's　apron。　　This　cleanliness　was　the　expiring　effort　of

the　respectable　couple；　and　nothing　then　remained　to　Mr。　Anderson

but　to　get　chalked　upon　his　spade　in　snow…white　copy…book

characters；　HUNGRY！　and　to　sit　down　here。　　Yes；　one　thing　more

remained　to　Mr。　Anderson　…　his　character；　Monarchs　could　not

deprive　him　of　his　hard…earned　character。　　Accordingly；　as　you　come

up　with　this　spectacle　of　virtue　in　distress；　Mrs。　Anderson　rises；

and　with　a　decent　curtsey　presents　for　your　consideration　a

certificate　from　a　Doctor　of　Divinity；　the　reverend　the　Vicar　of

Upper　Dodgington；　who　informs　his　Christian　friends　and　all　whom　it

may　concern　that　the　bearers；　John　Anderson　and　lawful　wife；　are

persons　to　whom　you　cannot　be　too　liberal。　　This　benevolent　pastor

omitted　no　work　of　his　hands　to　fit　the　good　couple　out；　for　with

half　an　eye　you　can　recognise　his　autograph　on　the　spade。



Another　class　of　tramp　is　a　man；　the　most　valuable　part　of　whose

stock…in…trade　is　a　highly　perplexed　demeanour。　　He　is　got　up　like

a　countryman；　and　you　will　often　come　upon　the　poor　fellow；　while

he　is　endeavouring　to　decipher　the　inscription　on　a　milestone　…

quite　a　fruitless　endeavour；　for　he　cannot　read。　　He　asks　your

pardon；　he　truly　does　（he　is　very　slow　of　speech；　this　tramp；　and

he　looks　in　a　bewildered　way　all　round　the　prospect　while　he　talks

to　you）；　but　all　of　us　shold　do　as　we　wold　be　done　by；　and　he'll

take　it　kind；　if　you'll　put　a　power　man　in　the　right　road　fur　to

jine　his　eldest　son　as　has　broke　his　leg　bad　in　the　masoning；　and

is　in　this　heere　Orspit'l　as　is　wrote　down　by　Squire　Pouncerby's

own　hand　as　wold　not　tell　a　lie　fur　no　man。　　He　then　produces　from

under　his　dark　frock　（being　always　very　slow　and　perplexed）　a　neat

but　worn　old　leathern　purse；　from　which　he　takes　a　scrap　of　paper。

On　this　scrap　of　paper　is　written；　by　Squire　Pouncerby；　of　The

Grove；　'Please　to　direct　the　Bearer；　a　poor　but　very　worthy　man；　to

the　Sussex　County　Hospital；　near　Brighton'　…　a　matter　of　some

difficulty　at　the　moment；　seeing　that　the　request　comes　suddenly

upon　you　in　the　depths　of　Hertfordshire。　　The　more　you　endeavour　to

indicate　where　Brighton　is　…　when　you　have　with　the　greatest

difficulty　remembered　…　the　less　the　devoted　father　can　be　made　to

comprehend；　and　the　more　obtusely　he　stares　at　the　prospect；

whereby；　being　reduced　to　extremity；　you　recommend　the　faithful

parent　to　begin　by　going　to　St。　Albans；　and　present　him　with　half…

a…crown。　　It　does　him　good；　no　doubt；　but　scarcely　helps　him

forward；　since　you　find　him　lying　drunk　that　same　evening　in　the

wheelwright's　sawpit　under　the　shed　where　the　felled　trees　are；

opposite　the　sign　of　the　Three　Jolly　Hedgers。



But；　the　most　vicious；　by　far；　of　all　the　idle　tramps；　is　the　tramp

who　pretends　to　have　been　a　gentleman。　　'Educated；'　he　writes；　from

the　village　beer…shop　in　pale　ink　of　a　ferruginous　complexion；

'educated　at　Trin。　Coll。　Cam。　…　nursed　in　the　lap　of　affluence　…

once　in　my　small　way　the　pattron　of　the　Muses；'　&c。　&c。　&c。　…

surely　a　sympathetic　mind　will　not　withhold　a　trifle；　to　help　him

on　to　the　market…town　where　he　thinks　of　giving　a　Lecture　to　the

FRUGES　CONSUMERE　NATI；　on　things　in　general？　　This　shameful

creature　lolling　about　hedge　tap…rooms　in　his　ragged　clothes；　now

so　far　from　being　black　that　they　look　as　if　they　never　can　have

been　black；　is　more　selfish　and　insolent　than　even　the　savage

tramp。　　He　would　sponge　on　the　poorest　boy　for　a　farthing；　and

spurn　him　when　he　had　got　it；　he　would　interpose　（if　he　could　get

anything　by　it）　between　the　baby　and　the　mother's　breast。　　So　much

lower　than　the　company　he　keeps；　for　his　maudlin　assumption　of

being　higher；　this　pitiless　rascal　blights　the　summer　road　as　he

maunders　on　between　the　luxuriant　hedges；　where　（to　my　thinking）

even　the　wild　convolvulus　and　rose　and　sweet…briar；　are　the　worse

for　his　going　by；　and　need　time　to　recover　from　the　taint　of　him　in

the　air。



The　young　fellows　who　trudge　along　barefoot；　five　or　six　together；

their　boots　slung　over　their　shoulders；　their　shabby　bundles　under

their　arms；　their　sticks　newly　cut　from　some　roadside　wood；　are　not

eminently　prepossessing；　but　are　much　less　objectionable。　　There　is

a　tramp…fellowship　among　them。　　They　pick　one　another　up　at　resting

stations；　and　go　on　in　companies。　　They　always　go　at　a　fast　swing　…

though　they　generally　limp　too　…　and　there　is　invariably　one　of　the

company　who　has　much　ado　to　keep　up　with　the　rest。　　They　generally

talk　about　horses；　and　any　other　means　of　locomotion　than　walking：

or；　one　of　the　company　relates　some　recent　experiences　of　the　road

…　which　are　always　disputes　and　difficulties。　　As　for　example。　　'So

as　I'm　a　standing　at　the　pump　in　the　market；　blest　if　there　don't

come　up　a　Beadle；　and　he　ses；　〃Mustn't　stand　here；〃　he　ses。　　〃Why

not？〃　I　ses。　　〃No　beggars　allowed　in　this　town；〃　he　ses。　　〃Who's　a

beggar？〃　I　ses。　　〃You　are；〃　he　ses。　　〃Who　ever　see　ME　beg？　　Did

YOU？〃　I　ses。　　〃Then　you're　a　tramp；〃　he　ses。　　〃I'd　rather　be　that

than　a　Beadle；〃　I　ses。'　　（The　company　express　great　approval。）

'〃Would　you？〃　he　ses　to　me。　　〃Yes；　I　would；〃　I　ses　to　him。　　〃Well；〃

he　ses；　〃anyhow；　get　out　of　this　town。〃　　〃Why；　blow　your　little

town！〃　I　ses；　〃who　wants　to　be　in　it？　　Wot　does　your　dirty　little

town　mean　by　comin'　and　stickin'　itself　in　the　road　to　anywhere？

Why　don't　you　get　a　shovel　and　a　barrer；　and　clear　your　town　out　o'

people's　way？〃'　　（The　company　expressing　the　highest　approval　and

laughing　aloud；　they　all　go　down　the　hill。）



Then；　there　are　the　tramp　handicraft　men。　　Are　they　not　all　over

England；　in　this　Midsummer　time？　　Where　does　the　lark　sing；　the

corn　grow；　the　mill　turn；　the　river　run；　and　they　are　not　among　the

lights　and　shadows；　tinkering；　chair…mending；　umbrella…mending；

clock…mending；　knife…grinding？　　Surely；　a　pleasant　thing；　if　we

were　in　that　condition　of　life；　to　grind　our　way　through　Kent；

Sussex；　and　Surrey。　　For　the　worst　six　weeks　or　so；　we　should　see

the　sparks　we　ground　off；　fiery　bright　against　a　background　of

green　wheat　and　green　leaves。　　A　little　later；　and　the　ripe　harvest

would　pale　our　sparks　from　red　to　yellow；　until　we　got　the　dark

newly…turned　land　for　a　background　again；　and　they　were　red　once

more。　　By　that　time；　we　should　have　ground　our　way　to　the　sea

cliffs；　and　the　whirr　of　our　wheel　would　be　lost　in　the　breaking　of

the　waves。　　Our　next　variety　in　sparks　would　be　derived　from

contrast　with　the　gorgeous　medley　of　colours　in　the　autumn　woods；

and；　by　the　time　we　had　ground　our　way　round　to　the　heathy　lands

between　Reigate　and　Croydon；　doing　a　prosperous　stroke　of　business

all　along；　we　should　show　like　a　little　firework　in　the　light

frosty　air；　and　be　the　next　best　thing　to　the　blacksmith's　forge。

Very　agreeable；　too；　to　go　on　a　chair…mending　tour。　　What　judges　we

should　be　of　rushes；　and　how　knowingly　（with　a　sheaf　and　a

bottomless　chair　at　our　back）　we　should　lounge　on　bridges；　looking

over　at　osier…beds！　　Among　all　the　innumerable　occupations　that

cannot　possibly　be　transacted　without　the　assistance　of　lookers…on；

chair…mending　may　take　a　station　in　the　first　rank。　　When　we　sat

down　with　our　backs　against　the　barn　or　the　public…house；　and　began

to　mend；　what　a　sense　of　popularity　would　grow　upon　us！　　When　all

the　children　came　to　look　at　us；　and　the　tailor；　and　the　general

dealer；　and　the　farmer　who　h