t once to speak and to be silent concerning my passion； for the young girl who； in my presence； was always serene and unconscious had not been informed of the reason of my constant visits； her parents were determined that the most important decision of her life should rest entirely with her。 But does not the presence of our beloved satisfy the utmost desire of passionate love？ In that presence do we not know the happiness of the Christian who stands before God？ If for me more than for any other it was torture to have no right to give expression to the impulses of my heart； to force back into its depths the burning words that treacherously wrong the yet more ardent emotions which strive to find an utterance in speech； I found； nevertheless； in the merest trifles a channel through which my passionate love poured itself forth but the more vehemently for this constraint； till every least occurrence came to have an excessive importance。
〃I beheld her； not for brief moments； but for whole hours。 There were pauses between my question and her answer； and long musings； when； with the tones of her voice lingering in my ears； I sought to divine from them the secret of her inmost thoughts； perhaps her fingers would tremble as I gave her some object of which she had been in search； or I would devise pretexts to lightly touch her dress or her hair； to take her hand in mine； to compel her to speak more than she wished； all these nothings were great events for me。 Eyes and voice and gestures were freighted with mysterious messages of love in hours of ecstasy like these； and this was the only language permitted me by the quiet maidenly reserve of the young girl before me。 Her manner towards me underwent no change； with me she was always as a sister with a brother； yet； as my passion grew； and the contrast between her glances and mine； her words and my utterance； became more striking； I felt at last that this timid silence was the only means by which she could express her feelings。 Was she not always in the salon whenever I came？ Did she not stay there until my visit； expected and perhaps foreseen； was over？ Did not this mute tryst betray the secret of her innocent soul？ Nay； whilst I spoke； did she not listen with a pleasure which she could not hide？
〃At last； no doubt； her parents grew impatient with this artless behavior and sober love…making。 I was almost as timid as their daughter； and perhaps on this account found favor in their eyes。 They regarded me as a man worthy of their esteem。 My old friend was taken into their confidence； both father and mother spoke of me in the most flattering terms； I had become their adopted son； and more especially they singled out my moral principles for praise。 In truth； I had found my youth again； among these pure and religious surroundings early beliefs and early faith came back to the man of thirty…two。
〃The summer was drawing to a close。 Affairs of some importance had detained the family in Paris longer than their wont； but when September came； and they were able to leave town at last for an estate in Auvergne； her father entreated me to spend a couple of months with them in an old chateau hidden away among the mountains of Cantal。 I paused before accepting this friendly invitation。 My hesitation brought me the sweetest and most delightful unconscious confession； a revelation of the mysteries of a girlish heart。 Evelina 。 。 。 DIEU！〃 exclaimed Benassis； and he said no more for a time； wrapped in his own thoughts。
〃Pardon me； Captain Bluteau；〃 he resumed； after a long pause。 〃For twelve years I have not uttered the name that is always hovering in my thoughts； that a voice calls in my hearing even when I sleep。 Evelina （since I have named her） raised her head with a strange quickness and abruptness； for about all her movements there was an instinctive grace and gentleness； and looked at me。 There was no pride in her face； but rather a wistful anxiety。 Then her color rose； and her eyelids fell； it gave me an indescribable pleasure never felt before that they should fall so slowly； I could only stammer out my reply in a faltering voice。 The emotion of my own heart made swift answer to hers。 She thanked me by a happy look； and I almost thought that there were tears in her eyes。 In that moment we had told each other everything。 So I went into the country with her family。 Since the day when our hearts had understood each other； nothing seemed to be as it had been before； everything about us had acquired a fresh significance。
〃Love； indeed； is always the same； though our imagination determines the shape that love must assume； like and unlike； therefore； is love in every soul in which he dwells； and passion becomes a unique work in which the soul expresses its sympathies。 In the old trite saying that love is a projection of selfan egoisme a deuxlies a profound meaning known only to philosopher and poet； for it is ourself in truth that we love in that other。 Yet； though love manifests itself in such different ways that no pair of lovers since the world began is like any other pair before or since； they all express themselves after the same fashion； and the same words are on the lips of every girl； even of the most innocent； convent…bred maidenthe only difference lies in the degree of imaginative charm in their ideas。 But between Evelina and other girls there was this difference； that where another would have poured out her feelings quite naturally； Evelina regarded these innocent confidences as a concession made to the stormy emotions which had invaded the quiet sanctuary of her girlish soul。 The constant struggle between her heart and her principles gave to the least event of her life； so peaceful in appearance； in reality so profoundly agitated； a character of force very superior to the exaggerations of young girls whose manners are early rendered false by the world about them。 All through the journey Evelina discovered beauty in the scenery through which we passed； and spoke of it with admiration。 When we think that we may not give expression to the happiness which is given to us by the presence of one we love； we pour out the secret gladness that overflows our hearts upon inanimate things； investing them with beauty in our happiness。 The charm of the scenery which passed before our eyes became in this way an interpreter between us； for in our praises of the landscape we revealed to each other the secrets of our love。 Evelina's mother sometimes took a mischievous pleasure in disconcerting her daughter。
〃 'My dear child； you have been through this valley a score of times without seeming to admire it！' she remarked after a somewhat too enthusiastic phrase from Evelina。
〃 'No doubt it was because I was not old enough to understand beauty of this kind； mother。'
〃Forgive me for dwelling on this trifle； which can have no charm for you； captain； but the simple words brought me an indescribable joy； which had its source in the glance directed towards me as she spoke。 So some village lighted by sunrise； some ivy…covered ruin which we had seen together； memories of outward and visible things； served to deepen and strengthen the impressions of our happiness； they seemed to be landmarks on the way through which we were passing towards a bright future that lay before us。
〃We reached the chateau belonging to her family； where I spent about six weeks； the only time in my life during which Heaven has vouchsafed complete happiness to me。 I enjoyed pleasures unknown to town…dwellers all the happiness which two lovers find in living beneath the same roof； an anticipation of the life they will spend together。 To stroll through the fields； to be alone together at times if we wished it； to look over an old water…mill； to sit beneath a tree in some lovely glen among the hills； the lovers' talks； the sweet confidences drawn forth by which each made some progress day by day in the other's heart。 Ah！ sir； the out…of…door life； the beauty of earth and heaven； is a perfect accompaniment to the perfect happiness of the soul！ To mingle our careless talk with the song of the birds among the dewy leaves； to smile at each other as we gazed on the sky； to turn our steps slowly homewards at the sound of the bell that always rings too soon； to admire together some little detail in the landscape； to watch the fitful movements of an insect； to look closely at a gleaming demoiselle flythe delicate creature that resembles an innocent and loving girl； in such ways as these are not one's thoughts drawn daily a little higher？ The memories of my forty days of happiness have in a manner colored all the rest of my life； memories that are all the fairer and fill the greater space in my thoughts because since then it has been my fate never to be understood。 To this day there are scenes of no special interest for a casual observer； but full of bitter significance for a broken heart； which recall those vanished days； and the love that is not forgotten yet。
〃I do not know whether you noticed the effect of the sunset light on the cottage where little Jacques lives？ Everything shone so brightly in the fiery rays of the sun； and then all at once the whole landscape grew dark and dreary。 That sudden change was like the change in my own life at thi