scene was extraordinary； but all was pleasing。 When I turned from it
and repassed the trap…door； I could scarcely see my way down the
ladder； the attic seemed black as a vault compared with that arch of
blue air to which I had been looking up； and to that sunlit scene of
grove； pasture； and green hill； of which the hall was the centre；
and over which I had been gazing with delight。
Mrs。 Fairfax stayed behind a moment to fasten the trap…door； I；
by dint of groping； found the outlet from the attic； and proceeded
to descend the narrow garret staircase。 I lingered in the long passage
to which this led； separating the front and back rooms of the third
storey： narrow； low； and dim； with only one little window at the far
end； and looking； with its two rows of small black doors all shut；
like a corridor in some Bluebeard's castle。
While I paced softly on； the last sound I expected to hear in so
still a region； a laugh； struck my ear。 It was a curious laugh；
distinct； formal； mirthless。 I stopped： the sound ceased； only for
an instant； it began again； louder： for at first； though distinct；
it was very low。 It passed off in a clamorous peal that seemed to wake
an echo in every lonely chamber； though it originated but in one；
and I could have pointed out the door whence the accents issued。
'Mrs。 Fairfax！' I called out： for I now heard her descending the
great stairs。 'Did you hear that loud laugh？ Who is it？'
'Some of the servants； very likely；' she answered： 'perhaps Grace
Poole。'
'Did you hear it？' I again inquired。
'Yes； plainly： I often hear her： she sews in one of these rooms。
Sometimes Leah is with her； they are frequently noisy together。'
The laugh was repeated in its low； syllabic tone； and terminated in
an odd murmur。
'Grace！' exclaimed Mrs。 Fairfax。
I really did not expect any Grace to answer； for the laugh was as
tragic； as preternatural a laugh as any I ever heard； and； but that it
was high noon； and that no circumstance of ghostliness accompanied the
curious cachinnation； but that neither scene nor season favoured fear；
I should have been superstitiously afraid。 However； the event showed
me I was a fool for entertaining a sense even of surprise。
The door nearest me opened； and a servant came out；… a woman of
between thirty and forty； a set； square…made figure； red…haired； and
with a hard； plain face： any apparition less romantic or less
ghostly could scarcely be conceived。
'Too much noise； Grace；' said Mrs。 Fairfax。 'Remember
directions！' Grace curtseyed silently and went in。
'She is a person we have to sew and assist Leah in her
housemaid's work；' continued the widow； 'not altogether
unobjectionable in some points； but she does well enough。 By the
bye； how have you got on with your new pupil this morning？'
The conversation； thus turned on Adele； continued till we reached
the light and cheerful region below。 Adele came running to meet us
in the hall； exclaiming…
'Mesdames； vous etes servies！' adding； 'J'ai bien faim； moi！'
We found dinner ready； and waiting for us in Mrs。 Fairfax's room。
CHAPTER XII
THE promise of a smooth career； which my first calm introduction to
Thornfield Hall seemed to pledge； was not belied on a longer
acquaintance with the place and its inmates。 Mrs。 Fairfax turned out
to be what she appeared； a placid…tempered； kind…natured woman； of
competent education and average intelligence。 My pupil was a lively
child； who had been spoilt and indulged； and therefore was sometimes
wayward； but as she was committed entirely to my care； and no
injudicious interference from any quarter ever thwarted my plans for
her improvement； she soon forgot her little freaks； and became
obedient and teachable。 She had no great talents； no marked traits
of character； no peculiar development of feeling or taste which raised
her one inch above the ordinary level of childhood； but neither had
she any deficiency or vice which sunk her below it。 She made
reasonable progress； entertained for me a vivacious； though perhaps
not very profound； affection； and by her simplicity； gay prattle；
and efforts to please； inspired me； in return； with a degree of
attachment sufficient to make us both content in each other's society。
This； par parenthese； will be thought cool language by persons
who entertain solemn doctrines about the angelic nature of children；
and the duty of those charged with their education to conceive for
them an idolatrous devotion： but I am not writing to flatter
parental egotism； to echo cant； or prop up humbug； I am merely telling
the truth。 I felt a conscientious solicitude for Adele's welfare and
progress； and a quiet liking for her little self： just as I
cherished towards Mrs。 Fairfax a thankfulness for her kindness； and
a pleasure in her society proportionate to the tranquil regard she had
for me； and the moderation of her mind and character。
Anybody may blame me who likes； when I add further； that； now and
then； when I took a walk by myself in the grounds； when I went down to
the gates and looked through them along the road； or when； while Adele
played with her nurse； and Mrs。 Fairfax made jellies in the storeroom；
I climbed the three staircases； raised the trap…door of the attic； and
having reached the leads； looked out afar over sequestered field and
hill； and along dim sky…line… that then I longed for a power of vision
which might overpass that limit； which might reach the busy world；
towns； regions full of life I had heard of but never seen… that then I
desired more of practical experience than I possessed； more of
intercourse with my kind； of acquaintance with variety of character；
than was here within my reach。 I valued what was good in Mrs。 Fairfax；
and what was good in Adele； but I believed in the existence of other
and more vivid kinds of goodness； and what I believed in I wished to
behold。
Who blames me？ Many； no doubt； and I shall be called
discontented。 I could not help it： the restlessness was in my
nature； it agitated me to pain sometimes。 Then my sole relief was to
walk along the corridor of the third storey； backwards and forwards；
safe in the silence and solitude of the spot； and allow my mind's
eye to dwell on whatever bright visions rose before it… and；
certainly； they were many and glowing； to let my heart be heaved by
the exultant movement； which； while it swelled it in trouble； expanded
it with life； and； best of all； to open my inward ear to a tale that
was never ended… a tale my imagination created； and narrated
continuously； quickened with all of incident； life； fire； feeling；
that I desired and had not in my actual existence。
It is in vain to say human beings ought to be satisfied with
tranquillity： they must have action； and they will make it if they
cannot find it。 Millions are condemned to a stiller doom than mine；
and millions are in silent revolt against their lot。 Nobody knows
how many rebellions besides political rebellions ferment in the masses
of life which people earth。 Women are supposed to be very calm
generally： but women feel just as men feel； they need exercise for
their faculties； and a field for their efforts； as much as their
brothers do； they suffer from too rigid a restraint； too absolute a
stagnation； precisely as men would suffer； and it is narrow…minded
in their more privileged fellow…creatures to say that they ought to
confine themselves to making puddings and knitting stockings； to
playing on the piano and embroidering bags。 It is thoughtless to
condemn them； or laugh at them； if they seek to do more or learn
more than custom has pronounced necessary for their sex。
When thus alone； I not unfrequently heard Grace Poole's laugh：
the same peal； the same low； slow ha！ ha！ which； when first heard； had
thrilled me： I heard； too； her eccentric murmurs； stranger than her
laugh。 There were days when she was quite silent； but there were
others when I could not account for the sounds she made。 Sometimes I
saw her： she would come out of her room with a basin； or a plate； or a
tray in her hand； go down to the kitchen and shortly return； generally
（oh； romantic reader； forgive me for telling the plain truth！） bearing
a pot of porter。 Her appearance always acted as a damper to the
curiosity raised by her oral oddities： hard…featured and staid； she
had no point to which interest could attach。 I made some attempts to
draw her into conversation； but she seemed a person of few words： a
monosyllabic reply usually cut short every effort of that sort。
The other members of the household； viz。； John and his wife； Leah
the housemaid； and Sophie the French nurse； were decent people； but in
no respect remarkable； with Sophie I used to talk French； and
sometimes I asked her questions about her native country； but she
was not of a descriptive or narrative turn； and generally gave such
vapid and confused answers as were calculated rather to check than
encourage inquiry。
October； November； December passed away。 One afternoon in
Ja