the complete writings-2- 第1部分

The　Complete　Writings　of　Charles　Dudley　Warner　Volume　2

by　Charles　Dudley　Warner




CONTENTS：

SAUNTERINGS




MISAPPREHENSIONS　CORRECTED

I　should　not　like　to　ask　an　indulgent　and　idle　public　to　saunter　about　with　me　under　a　misapprehension。　　It　would　be　more　agreeable　to　invite　it　to　go　nowhere　than　somewhere；　for　almost　every　one　has　been　somewhere；　and　has　written　about　it。　　The　only　compromise　I　can　suggest　is；　that　we　shall　go　somewhere；　and　not　learn　anything　about　it。　　The　instinct　of　the　public　against　any　thing　like　information　in　a　volume　of　this　kind　is　perfectly　justifiable；　and　the　reader　will　perhaps　discover　that　this　is　illy　adapted　for　a　text…book　in　schools；　or　for　the　use　of　competitive　candidates　in　the　civil…service　examinations。

Years　ago；　people　used　to　saunter　over　the　Atlantic；　and　spend　weeks　in　filling　journals　with　their　monotonous　emotions。　　That　is　all　changed　now；　and　there　is　a　misapprehension　that　the　Atlantic　has　been　practically　subdued；　but　no　one　ever　gets　beyond　the　rolling　forties〃　without　having　this　impression　corrected。

I　confess　to　have　been　deceived　about　this　Atlantic；　the　roughest　and　windiest　of　oceans。　　If　you　look　at　it　on　the　map；　it　does　n't　appear　to　be　much；　and；　indeed；　it　is　spoken　of　as　a　ferry。　　What　with　the　eight　and　nine　days'　passages　over　it；　and　the　laying　of　the　cable；　which　annihilates　distance；　I　had　the　impression　that　its　tedious　three　thousand　and　odd　miles　had　been；　somehow；　partly　done　away　with；　but　they　are　all　there。　　When　one　has　sailed　a　thousand　miles　due　east　and　finds　that　he　is　then　nowhere　in　particular；　but　is　still　out；　pitching　about　on　an　uneasy　sea；　under　an　inconstant　sky；　and　that　a　thousand　miles　more　will　not　make　any　perceptible　change；　he　begins　to　have　some　conception　of　the　unconquerable　ocean。　Columbus　rises　in　my　estimation。

I　was　feeling　uncomfortable　that　nothing　had　been　done　for　the　memory　of　Christopher　Columbus；　when　I　heard　some　months　ago　that　thirty…　seven　guns　had　been　fired　off　for　him　in　Boston。　　It　is　to　be　hoped　that　they　were　some　satisfaction　to　him。　　They　were　discharged　by　countrymen　of　his；　who　are　justly　proud　that　he　should　have　been　able；　after　a　search　of　only　a　few　weeks；　to　find　a　land　where　the　hand…organ　had　never　been　heard。　　The　Italians；　as　a　people；　have　not　profited　much　by　this　discovery；　not　so　much；　indeed；　as　the　Spaniards；　who　got　a　reputation　by　it　which　even　now　gilds　their　decay。　　That　Columbus　was　born　in　Genoa　entitles　the　Italians　to　celebrate　the　great　achievement　of　his　life；　though　why　they　should　discharge　exactly　thirty…seven　guns　I　do　not　know。　　Columbus　did　not　discover　the　United　States：　that　we　partly　found　ourselves；　and　partly　bought；　and　gouged　the　Mexicans　out　of。　　He　did　not　even　appear　to　know　that　there　was　a　continent　here。　　He　discovered　the　West　Indies；　which　he　thought　were　the　East；　and　ten　guns　would　be　enough　for　them。　　It　is　probable　that　he　did　open　the　way　to　the　discovery　of　the　New　World。　　If　he　had　waited；　however；　somebody　else　would　have　discovered　it；perhaps　some　Englishman；　and　then　we　might　have　been　spared　all　the　old　French　and　Spanish　wars。　　Columbus　let　the　Spaniards　into　the　New　World；　and　their　civilization　has　uniformly　been　a　curse　to　it。　　If　he　had　brought　Italians；　who　neither　at　that　time　showed；　nor　since　have　shown；　much　inclination　to　come；　we　should　have　had　the　opera；　and　made　it　a　paying　institution　by　this　time。　　Columbus　was　evidently　a　person　who　liked　to　sail　about；　and　did　n't　care　much　for　consequences。

Perhaps　it　is　not　an　open　question　whether　Columbus　did　a　good　thing　in　first　coming　over　here；　one　that　we　ought　to　celebrate　with　salutes　and　dinners。　　The　Indians　never　thanked　him；　for　one　party。　The　Africans　had　small　ground　to　be　gratified　for　the　market　he　opened　for　them。　　Here　are　two　continents　that　had　no　use　for　him。　He　led　Spain　into　a　dance　of　great　expectations；　which　ended　in　her　gorgeous　ruin。　　He　introduced　tobacco　into　Europe；　and　laid　the　foundation　for　more　tracts　and　nervous　diseases　than　the　Romans　had　in　a　thousand　years。　　He　introduced　the　potato　into　Ireland　indirectly；　and　that　caused　such　a　rapid　increase　of　population；　that　the　great　famine　was　the　result；　and　an　enormous　emigration　to　New　Yorkhence　Tweed　and　the　constituency　of　the　Ring。　　Columbus　is　really　responsible　for　New　York。　　He　is　responsible　for　our　whole　tremendous　experiment　of　democracy；　open　to　all　comers；　the　best　three　in　five　to　win。　　We　cannot　yet　tell　how　it　is　coming　out；　what　with　the　foreigners　and　the　communists　and　the　women。　　On　our　great　stage　we　are　playing　a　piece　of　mingled　tragedy　and　comedy；　with　what　denouement　we　cannot　yet　say。　　If　it　comes　out　well；　we　ought　to　erect　a　monument　to　Christopher　as　high　as　the　one　at　Washington　expects　to　be；　and　we　presume　it　is　well　to　fire　a　salute　occasionally　to　keep　the　ancient　mariner　in　mind　while　we　are　trying　our　great　experiment。　　And　this　reminds　me　that　he　ought　to　have　had　a　naval　salute。

There　is　something　almost　heroic　in　the　idea　of　firing　off　guns　for　a　man　who　has　been　stone…dead　for　about　four　centuries。　　It　must　have　had　a　lively　and　festive　sound　in　Boston；　when　the　meaning　of　the　salute　was　explained。　　No　one　could　hear　those　great　guns　without　a　quicker　beating　of　the　heart　in　gratitude　to　the　great　discoverer　who　had　made　Boston　possible。　　We　are　trying　to　〃realize〃　to　ourselves　the　importance　of　the　12th　of　October　as　an　anniversary　of　our　potential　existence。　　If　any　one　wants　to　see　how　vivid　is　the　gratitude　to　Columbus；　let　him　start　out　among　our　business…houses　with　a　subscription…paper　to　raise　money　for　powder　to　be　exploded　in　his　honor。　　And　yet　Columbus　was　a　well…meaning　man；　and　if　he　did　not　discover　a　perfect　continent；　he　found　the　only　one　that　was　left。

Columbus　made　voyaging　on　the　Atlantic　popular；　and　is　responsible　for　much　of　the　delusion　concerning　it。　　Its　great　practical　use　in　this　fast　age　is　to　give　one　an　idea　of　distance　and　of　monotony。

I　have　listened　in　my　time　with　more　or　less　pleasure　to　very　rollicking　songs　about　the　sea；　the　flashing　brine；　the　spray　and　the　tempest's　roar；　the　wet　sheet　and　the　flowing　sea；　a　life　on　the　ocean　wave；　and　all　the　rest　of　it。　　To　paraphrase　a　land　proverb；　let　me　write　the　songs　of　the　sea；　and　I　care　not　who　goes　to　sea　and　sings　'em。　　A　square　yard　of　solid　ground　is　worth　miles　of　the　pitching；　turbulent　stuff。　　Its　inability　to　stand　still　for　one　second　is　the　plague　of　it。　　To　lie　on　deck　when　the　sun　shines；　and　swing　up　and　down；　while　the　waves　run　hither　and　thither　and　toss　their　white　caps；　is　all　well　enough　to　lie　in　your　narrow　berth　and　roll　from　side　to　side　all　night　long；　to　walk　uphill　to　your　state…room　door；　and；　when　you　get　there；　find　you　have　got　to　the　bottom　of　the　hill；　and　opening　the　door　is　like　lifting　up　a　trap…door　in　the　floor；　to　deliberately　start　for　some　object；　and；　before　you　know　it；　to　be　flung　against　it　like　a　bag　of　sand；　to　attempt　to　sit　down　on　your　sofa；　and　find　you　are　sitting　up；　to　slip　and　slide　and　grasp　at　everything　within　reach；　and　to　meet　everybody　leaning　and　walking　on　a　slant；　as　if　a　heavy　wind　were　blowing；　and　the　laws　of　gravitation　were　reversed；　to　lie　in　your　berth；　and　hear　all　the　dishes　on　the　cabin…table　go　sousing　off　against　the　wall　in　a　general　smash；　to　sit　at　table　holding　your　soup…plate　with　one　hand；　and　watching　for　a　chance　to　put　your　spoon　in　when　it　comes　high　tide　on　your　side　of　the　dish；　to　vigilantly　watch；　the　lurch　of　the　heavy　dishes　while　holding　your　glass　and　your　plate　and　your　knife　and　fork；　and　not　to　notice　it　when　Brown；　who　sits　next　you；　gets　the　whole　swash　of　the　gravy　from　the　roast…beef　dish　on　his　light…colored　pantaloons；　and　see　the　look　of　dismay　that　only　Brown　can　assume　on　such　an　occasion；　to　see　Mrs。　Brown　advance　to　the　table；　suddenly　stop　and　hesitate；　two　waiters　rush　at　her；　with　whom　she　struggles　wildly；　only　to　go　down　in　a　heap　with　them　in　the　opposite　corner；　to　see　her　partially　recover；　but　only　to　shoot　back　again　through　her　state…room　door；　and　be　seen　no　more；all　this　is　quite　pleasant　and　refreshing　if　you　are　tired　of　land；　but　you　get　quite　enough　of　it　in　a　couple　of　weeks。　　You　become；　in　time；　even　a　little　tired　of　the　Jew　who　goes　about　wishing　〃he　vas　a　veek　older；〃　and　the　eccentric　man；　who　looks　at　no　one；　and　streaks　about　the　cabin　and　on　deck；　without　any　purpose；　and　plays　shuffle…board　alone；　always　beating　himself；　and　goes　on　the　deck　occasionally　through　the　sky…light　instead　of　by　the　cabin　door；　washes　himself　at　the　salt…water　pump；　and　won't　sleep　in　his　state…room；　saying　he　is　n't　used　to　sleeping　in　a　bed；as　if　the　hard　narrow；　uneasy　shelf　of　a　berth　was　anything　like　a　bed！and　you　have　heard　at　last　pretty　nearly　all　about　the　officers；　and　their　twenty　and　thirty　years　of　sea…life；　and　every　ocean　and　port　on　the　habitable　globe　where　they　have　been。　　There　comes　a　day　when　you　are　quite　ready　for　land；　and　the　scream　of　the　〃gull〃　is　a　welcome　sound。

Even　the　sailors　lose　the　vivacity　of　the　first　of　the　voyage。　　The　first　two　or　three　days　we　had　their　quaint　and　half…doleful　singing　in　chorus