〃That's different。〃
〃Why？〃
〃Because the wolves and rats have a treaty； and through you the leopards and the wolves are joined。〃
I shook my head。 〃You're quibbling； Donovan； or deliberately missing the point。 Let's just agree to try and help each other； that's all。 I don't have any ulterior motives。 I'm just trying to keep the damage to a minimum。〃
〃It's true you didn't have to save my girls。 It nearly cost you your life。〃
〃And you didn't have to go to the lupanar with me。 But you did。 That's how it works； cooperation。〃
He thought for a moment； then nodded。 〃Agreed。 I'll try to get the others to agree also。 You're right； you are right。 If we'd just talk to each other； we could prevent a lot of bad things from happening。〃
〃Great；〃 I said； and let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding。 I wanted this。 I wanted them to talk to each other； to help each other。
Someone cleared their throat； softly。 It made us all look at Gil。 He was still huddled beside the couch； where he'd been the entire time。 〃You have something to say？〃 Donovan asked。
〃How far does this new spirit of cooperation go？〃 he asked。 His uptilted green eyes were almost round with anxiety。 He gripped his knees so hard his hands were mottled。 He was scared； you could smell it on him； that and a neck…ruffling scent that I didn't recognize。
〃What do you mean？〃 Donovan asked。
〃I'm actually talking to Anita；〃 Gil said。
I glanced at Micah then back to the man huddled on the floor。 〃What do you want to know？〃 I asked。
〃I'm the only werefox in town。 I don't have an alpha； or any family。〃 He stopped there and licked his lips nervously。
〃And？〃 I said。
〃How much help are you willing to give？〃
〃How much do you need？〃
〃Can I stay with you until this thing； or whatever； is caught？〃
I felt my eyes go wide。 I opened my mouth； closed it； exchanged a look with Micah。 He shrugged。 〃It has to be your call。 It's your house。〃
Point。 I turned back to Gil。 〃I don't know you at all。 If you are a bad person； and you do bad things to my people； I will kill you； but if you really just want someplace to hide for a few days； you can stay。〃
He seemed to get smaller； more huddled。 〃I won't hurt anybody。 I just want to feel safe again； that's all。〃
I looked at Donovan。 〃Do you know anything about him？〃
〃He's scared of his own shadow。 I wouldn't trust him to help in an emergency。 I think he'd save himself first。〃
Gil didn't argue with Donovan's estimation of him； he just huddled； trembling。 〃If we only help the strong ones； then we're not helping ourselves；〃 I said。
〃You'll take him in； knowing he can't help you in a fight； and would probably run to save his own skin？〃 Donovan asked。
I looked at those wide； terror…filled eyes and saw something besides fear； a pleading。 They said； 〃Please； please help me。〃
〃You can stay； and we'll protect you； but if there is an emergency I expect you to do your best。 You don't have to fight； but don't be a hindrance。〃
〃What's that mean？〃 he asked。
〃It means if the guns e out； hide under something； get low to the ground。 Don't make yourself a target。 If my people get hurt and you have a chance to drag them to safety but leave them to die instead； you'll be next。〃
〃I'm not brave； Anita； I'm not even a little bit brave。〃
〃Don't be brave； Gil； just do what you're told； do your best whatever that is； but understand the rules。 Keep yourself out of the line of fire because we won't have time to worry about you when the fighting starts。 Help if you can； stay out of the way if you can't。 Simple。〃
He nodded； rubbing his chin between his knees； over and over。 〃Simple；〃 he whispered； 〃I wish life were simple。〃
〃Life isn't simple； Gil； but a fight is。〃 I knelt in front of him； and I hated the weakness that radiated from him。 Dear God； the last thing I needed was another emotional cripple following me around。 But I couldn't kick him out。 Anita the bleeding heart； who'd have thought it？ I stared at him； until his frightened eyes met mine。 〃A fight is simple； Gil。 You protect yourself； your people； and you kill the bad guys。 You do whatever it takes to get yourself and your people out alive。〃
〃How do you know who the bad guys are？〃 he asked； voice almost a whisper。
〃Anyone in the room that isn't us；〃 I said。
〃And you kill them； just like that？〃
I nodded。 〃Exactly；〃 I said。
〃I don't think I could kill anyone。〃
〃Then hide。〃
He did that chin…rubbing nod thing again； like he was scent marking his own knees。 〃I can hide； I know how to do that。〃
I touched his face very gently。 He flinched； then relaxed a little。 All the animals liked to be touched。 〃I'm not very good at hiding； maybe you can teach me。〃
〃Why would you need to know how to hide？〃 he asked。
〃Because there's always someone； or something； bigger and badder than you are。〃
〃I can teach you how to hide； but I don't know if I can learn how to kill。〃
Where had I heard that before？ Oh； I knew Richard。 But even he had learned how； in the end。 〃You'd be surprised what you can learn； Gil； if you have to。〃
He hugged himself again。 〃I don't think I want to learn how to kill people。〃
〃Now that；〃 I said； 〃is a different problem altogether。〃
〃I don't want to；〃 he said。
I stared down at him。 〃Then don't； but don't let your squeamishness get any of my people killed。〃
〃It's more likely to kill me。〃
〃True； but that's your choice get yourself killed if you want； but don't bring harm to me or mine because of some moral high ground。〃
〃Would you really kill me for it？〃
I knelt back in front of him。 〃You can stay with me and I'll keep you safe； or die trying； but if you fuck up and cause the death of one of my leopards； or my friends； I will kill you。 I don't want you to be crying later and saying you didn't understand。 Because if you've earned it； I will shoot you while you beg me not to。〃
〃But who decides whether I deserve it？〃 he asked。
〃I do。〃
He stared up at me as if he weren't sure if he was safer with me or without me。 I watched him think it through and felt nothing； no pity。 Because Gil the werefox was a liability。 In a bat situation he was a fucking casualty waiting to happen。 I was civilized enough to give him protection when he asked； but not civilized enough to pay in the blood of those I held dear。 In that moment I knew I wasn't a sociopath； because if I had been； I'd have kicked his ass out the door。 Oh； hell； I'd have shot him and put him out of everyone's misery。 Instead I offered him a hand； and pulled him to his feet。
〃Do you understand the rules？〃 I asked。
〃I understand；〃 he whispered。
〃You willing to live by them？〃
He gave one small nod。
〃You willing to die by them？〃
He took a shaky breath； then gave another nod。
I smiled and knew it never reached my eyes。 〃Then wele to the club； and keep your head down。 There's some business we have to take care of tonight。 You can e along。〃 Even I wasn't sure if that was an invitation or a threat。
47
THERE WAS STILL a thread of light in the sky； like a slender golden ribbon； glowing against the push of dark； dark clouds when we parked in the back of the Circus of the Damned。 The back parking lot was for employees。 It was dark； bare； not the least bit entertaining； unlike the front； which was like a carnival。 I'd driven past the bright lights and dramatic posters without a second glance。
〃Did the clowns up front have fangs？〃 Caleb asked。
It wasn't until he asked that that I realized that none of them had ever been to the Circus。 I undid my seat belt and leaned around so I could see him in the middle section of seats。 He was sitting pressed against the door with Merle's broad shoulders crowding him。 Nathaniel was on the other side of Merle。 Cherry and Zane were in the back seats with Gil。 Micah was sitting up front with me。 Until we knew my house wasn't a free…fire zone we'd keep everybody together。 Rafael had sent two new bodyguards over； but they'd arrived just as we were leaving； and I wouldn't make anyone in the Jeep move。 They followed us； not happy； but taking orders； which was good。
I answered Caleb's question。 〃Yeah； the big spinning clowns on top of the sign have fangs。〃
〃I saw a poster for zombie raisings。 Do you do that？〃 Merle asked。
I shook my head。 〃I don't believe in using God…given gifts for entertainment purposes。〃
〃I didn't mean to insult you；〃 he said。
I shrugged。 〃Sorry； I'm a little touchy about shit like that。 I don't approve of a lot of things some of my fellow animators do for money。〃
〃You raise the dead for money；〃 Caleb said。
I nodded。 〃Yeah； but I've turned down more money than I've taken。〃
〃Turned down； why？〃 he asked。
I shrugged。 〃Local money who wanted to have his Halloween party in a cemetery so I could raise zombies at midnight。 Or the guy that had offered a million if I could raise Marilyn Monroe and guarantee that she'd do anything he asked for a night。〃 I shuddered。 〃I told that one if I even heard a rumor that he'd gotten someone to do the job； I'd see his ass in prison。〃
Caleb's eyes were a little wide。 I think I'd shocked him。 Good to know that I could。 〃You're deeply moral；〃 Merle said； a tone in his voice like he was surprised。