〃I've got to go；〃 I said to Jean…Claude。
〃Do you wish me to speak to Richard？〃
〃No； I think you've done enough damage for one night。〃
〃I meant only to help。〃
〃Sure you did。〃
〃Ma petite。〃
〃Yes。〃
〃Be careful； and remember what I have said about the ardeur。 There is no shame in it。〃
〃Even you don't believe that；〃 I said。
〃Ah； you have found me out。 There is no shame in feeding； if you feed immediately on a person of your own choosing。 If you fight； then you will find yourself feeding on someone not of your choosing； in a place not of your choosing。 I do not think you would enjoy that； ma petite。〃
He was right about that anyway。 〃I'll talk to you tomorrow after you get up。 I haven't forgotten Damian； you know。〃
〃I did not think that you had； ma petite。 I will look forward to your call。〃
I hung up without saying good…bye； mainly because I was angry； and scared。 Not only did I have Richard to deal with tonight and Gregory to save； but tomorrow morning when I woke up； the ardeur would be there； waiting。 There was a chance that it wouldn't be； that the one day was the only time I'd have it； but I couldn't count on that。 I had to plan for the worst…case scenario。 Worst case was I would wake up tomorrow and need to feed just like I had this morning。 The big question was； who would I feed on； and could I live with myself after I'd done it？
35
I HATE BEING awake at three in the morning。 It is the godforsaken heart of darkness when the body runs slow； and the brain runs slower； and all you want to do is sleep。 But I had promises to keep； and miles to go before I could sleep。 Or at least a couple of miracles to perform before I could go to bed。
Dr。 Lillian had unhooked Gregory's IV； but he was still bundled in the quilts。 He sat on the picnic table on the deck； cradled between Zane and Cherry。 Dr。 Lillian kept touching Gregory； checking his pulse； how clammy his skin was。 She was frowning and clearly not happy。 Nathaniel stayed by them； keeping the picnic table between him and Richard。 Richard hadn't tried to hurt him again； in fact； he'd ignored him studiously。 The other cats milled around near the sliding glass doors。 The two wererat bodyguards； Claudia and Igor； were standing to one side of me as I leaned on the railing。 They started following me around when Richard came out with his bandaged arm and Jamil and Shang…Da at his back。
Richard's power crept on the summer darkness like close thunder； making the hot； sticky night even thicker and making it harder to breathe。 I think it was the press of his power； the edge of his anger； that made the wererats start acting like bodyguards。 I'd tried telling them that Richard wouldn't hurt me； but Claudia had shrugged； and said； 〃Rafael told us to keep you safe； and that's what we're going to do。〃
〃Even if I tell you that there is no threat？〃
She shrugged again。 〃I'd say； you're a little too close to this one to make a sound judgment call。〃
I'd glanced at Igor。 〃You agree with her？〃
〃I never argue with a lady； especially one that can beat me at arm wrestling。〃
Igor's logic was hard to argue with； but it meant that I had acquired two tall； muscular shadows； and it irritated me。 But neither of them gave a damn whether I was happy or not。 They were following Rafael's orders； and my wishes didn't count。
So Richard and his bodyguards； and me； with mine； stood on the deck； facing Stephen； who had stripped off in preparation for the change。 If you made the change with clothes on； you ruined them。 Shapeshifters either haunted the thrift shops； looking for old clothes to wear on the night of the full moon； or went nude。
We all stood there in the circle of Richard's power。 The energy built around us like invisible lightning lashing around us。 The power literally crackled； raising the hair on our arms； raising the hair on our heads； like the hackles on a dog。
Jamil said； 〃Richard 。。。 〃 But one glance from Richard stopped him in mid…sentence。 The power rose another notch； squeezing around us like some kind of giant hand。
〃What's wrong； Richard？ What's with the power display？〃 I asked。
He turned to me； and the anger in his face made me want to step back； but I didn't。 I stood my ground； but it took effort。
〃Do you want to save your cat？〃 he asked； voice thick with the emotion that showed on his face； that crackled in his power。
My voice was almost a whisper； 〃Yes。〃
〃Then watch；〃 he said。
He spread his hands in front of Stephen； keeping them about eight inches away from the smaller man's shoulders。 The energy squeezed tight； and tighter until I had to swallow to try and clear my ears； as if there'd been a pressure change。 But swallowing didn't help。 It wasn't that kind of pressure。
Richard's hands convulsed； as if his fingers were digging into something invisible just in front of Stephen。 He staggered towards Richard； one step； and I was close enough to hear a small pained sound e from him。 Richard balled his hands into fists； and something shimmered between them like heat caught in the close summer darkness。 The bones in my face ached with the building power。 The air was almost too thick to breathe； as if it had weight。
Richard made one abrupt movement with his hands and the pressure broke； like a storm finally bursting to life。 For a second or two； I thought the heavy； clear liquid that burst around us was rain； but it was hot like blood； and it didn't fall from the sky。 It burst from Stephen's body。 I'd seen dozens of shape…shifters change； but nothing like this。 It was as if Stephen's body blew apart in a rain of hot； thick fluids and small bits of flesh。 The beast usually pulls itself from the human body； like a butterfly from a chrysalis； but not this time。 Stephen's body folded over on itself； and his man…wolf shape was just suddenly standing there。 It collapsed to its knees； panting； shivering。
I was left standing； not even breathing； covered in the rapidly cooling bits and pieces of Stephen's body。 When I could breathe again； I gasped。 〃Jesus Christ。〃
Stephen's fur was the color of dark； golden honey。 He crouched； shivering at Richard's feet。 Again； the change may hurt while the person is going through it； but once it's over； they usually stand up and start moving around。 Stephen seemed disoriented； almost like he was in pain。 What the hell was happening？
He crawled the last few steps to Richard； laying his long； teeth…filled snout against his wolf king's jogging shoes。 He was almost in a fetal position； great； muscular arms wrapped around golden fur； lying at his Ulfric's feet。 It was extreme submissive behavior； and I didn't know why。 Stephen hadn't done anything wrong。
I looked up at Richard。 His white shirt was plastered to his body with the thick fluids。 He turned his face to look at me； and the faint light of stars glistened in the wetness on his face。 A thick piece of something slid down his cheek as he glared at me。 The look on his face was defiant； as if he expected me to be angry with him。
I raised a shaking hand and wiped the worst of the gunk off of my face； flinging it onto the deck where it hit with a wet splat。 I looked at the bodyguards。 They too were spattered with the thick stuff； but not nearly as messy as Richard and I。 They hadn't been standing as close。 They all stared at Richard； stared at him with a mixture of horror and anger and astonishment on their faces； which let me know that something was very； very wrong。
I had to try twice before I could speak； and even then my voice was breathy。 〃I've seen a lot of shapeshifters change into their beasts； but I've never seen anything like that。 Was it different because you called Stephen's beast instead of him doing it on his own？〃
〃No；〃 Richard said。
I waited for more； but that was all he said； and it looked like all he intended to say。 But no just didn't cover it。 I looked at the others。 〃Okay； someone tell me what just happened here。〃
Jamil started to speak； then stopped and looked at Richard。 〃With my Ulfric's permission。〃 The words were polite； but the tone was angry； almost defiant。
Richard looked at him。 I couldn't see his face； but whatever look he gave Jamil； it was something that made the other man flinch。 Jamil dropped to one knee in the spreading pool of thick liquid。 He bowed his head。 〃I mean no offense； Ulfric。〃
〃That's a lie；〃 Richard said； and his voice was lower than normal； just a tone or two above a growl。
Jamil darted a glance upward； then bowed his head again。 〃I don't know what you want me to say； Ulfric。 Tell me； and I will say it。〃
Richard turned back to me； leaving Jamil kneeling。 〃I didn't just call Stephen's beast； I tore it from his body。〃
I glanced down at Stephen； who was still crouched at Richard's feet。 〃Why？〃 I asked。
〃It's usually punishment to do it this way。〃
〃What did Stephen do？〃
〃Nothing。〃 Richard's voice was harsh； almost as harsh as the look on his face。
〃Then why punish him？〃
〃Because I could。〃 His chin lifted when he said it； and that arrogance was back。
〃What the hell is wrong with you； Richard？〃
He laughed； and the sound was so inappropriate that it made me jump。 He laughed； but it was too loud； too harsh。 〃Didn't this teach you how to