I can give them here； let us reserve them for a nobler place； but for
examples of ordinary lustre； do we not every day see women amongst us who
surrender themselves for their husbands sole benefit； and by their
express order and mediation？ and； of old； Phaulius the Argian； who
offered his to King Philip out of ambition； as Galba did it out of
civility； who； having entertained Maecenas at supper； and observing that
his wife and he began to cast glances at one another and to make eyes and
signs； let himself sink down upon his cushion； like one in a profound
sleep； to give opportunity to their desires： which he handsomely
confessed； for thereupon a servant having made bold to lay hands on the
plate upon the table； he frankly cried； 〃What； you rogue？ do you not see
that I only sleep for Maecenas？〃 Such there may be； whose manners may be
lewd enough； whose will may be more reformed than another； who outwardly
carries herself after a more regular manner。 As we see some who complain
of having vowed chastity before they knew what they did； and I have also
known others really； complain of having been given up to debauchery
before they were of the years of discretion。 The vice of the parents or
the impulse of nature； which is a rough counsellor； may be the cause。
In the East Indies； though chastity is of singular reputation； yet custom
permitted a married woman to prostitute herself to any one who presented
her with an elephant； and that with glory； to have been valued at so high
a rate。 Phaedo the philosopher； a man of birth； after the taking of his
country Elis； made it his trade to prostitute the beauty of his youth； so
long as it lasted； to any one that would； for money thereby to gain his
living： and Solon was the first in Greece； 'tis said； who by his laws
gave liberty to women； at the expense of their chastity； to provide for
the necessities of life； a custom that Herodotus says had been received
in many governments before his time。 And besides； what fruit is there of
this painful solicitude？ For what justice soever there is in this
passion； we are yet to consider whether it turns to account or no： does
any one think to curb them； with all his industry？
〃Pone seram； cohibe： sed quis custodiet ipsos
Custodes？ cauta est； et ab illis incipit uxor。〃
＇〃Put on a lock； shut them up under a guard； but who shall guard
the guard？ she knows what she is about； and begins with them。〃
Juvenal； vi。 346。＇
What commodity will not serve their turn； in so knowing an age？
Curiosity is vicious throughout； but 'tis pernicious here。 'Tis folly to
examine into a disease for which there is no physic that does not inflame
and make it worse； of which the shame grows still greater and more public
by jealousy； and of which the revenge more wounds our children than it
heals us。 You wither and die in the search of so obscure a proof。 How
miserably have they of my time arrived at that knowledge who have been so
unhappy as to have found it out？ If the informer does not at the same
time apply a remedy and bring relief； 'tis an injurious information； and
that better deserves a stab than the lie。 We no less laugh at him who
takes pains to prevent it； than at him who is a cuckold and knows it not。
The character of cuckold is indelible： who once has it carries it to his
grave； the punishment proclaims it more than the fault。 It is to much
purpose to drag out of obscurity and doubt our private misfortunes；
thence to expose them on tragic scaffolds； and misfortunes that only hurt
us by being known； for we say a good wife or a happy marriage； not that
they are really so； but because no one says to the contrary。 Men should
be so discreet as to evade this tormenting and unprofitable knowledge：
and the Romans had a custom； when returning from any expedition； to send
home before to acquaint their wives with their coming； that they might
not surprise them； and to this purpose it is that a certain nation has
introduced a custom； that the priest shall on the wedding…day open the
way to the bride； to free the husband from the doubt and curiosity of
examining in the first assault； whether she comes a virgin to his bed； or
has been at the trade before。
But the world will be talking。 I know； a hundred honest men cuckolds；
honestly and not unbeseemingly； a worthy man is pitied； not disesteemed
for it。 Order it so that your virtue may conquer your misfortune； that
good men may curse the occasion； and that he who wrongs you may tremble
but to think on't。 And； moreover； who escapes being talked of at the
same rate； from the least even to the greatest？
〃Tot qui legionibus imperitivit
〃Et melior quam to multis fuit； improbe； rebus。〃
＇〃Many who have commanded legions； many a man much better far than
you； you rascal。〃Lucretius； iii。 1039； 1041。＇
Seest thou how many honest men are reproached with this in thy presence；
believe that thou art no more spared elsewhere。 But； the very ladies
will be laughing too； and what are they so apt to laugh at in this
virtuous age of ours as at a peaceable and well…composed marriage？ Each
amongst you has made somebody cuckold； and nature runs much in parallel；
in compensation； and turn for turn。 The frequency of this accident ought
long since to have made it more easy； 'tis now passed into custom。
Miserable passion！ which has this also； that it is incommunicable；
〃Fors etiam nostris invidit questibus aures；〃
＇〃Fortune also refuses ear to our complaints。〃
Catullus； lxvii。＇
for to what friend dare you intrust your griefs； who； if he does not
laugh at them； will not make use of the occasion to get a share of the
quarry？ The sharps； as well as the sweets of marriage； are kept secret
by the wise； and amongst its other troublesome conditions this to a
prating fellow； as I am； is one of the chief； that custom has rendered it
indecent and prejudicial to communicate to any one all that a man knows
and all that a man feels。 To give women the same counsel against
jealousy would be so much time lost； their very being is so made up of
suspicion； vanity； and curiosity； that to cure them by any legitimate way
is not to be hoped。 They often recover of this infirmity by a form of
health much more to be feared than the disease itself； for as there are
enchantments that cannot take away the evil but by throwing it upon
another； they also willingly transfer this ever to their husbands； when
they shake it off themselves。 And yet I know not； to speak truth；
whether a man can suffer worse from them than their jealousy； 'tis the
most dangerous of all their conditions； as the head is of all their
members。 Pittacus used to say； ＇Plutarch； On Contentment； c。 II。＇
that every one had his trouble； and that his was the jealous head of his
wife； but for which he should think himself perfectly happy。 A mighty
inconvenience； sure； which could poison the whole life of so just； so
wise； and so valiant a man； what must we other little fellows do？ The
senate of Marseilles had reason to grant him his request who begged leave
to kill himself that he might be delivered from the clamour of his wife；
for 'tis a mischief that is never removed but by removing the whole
piece； and that has no remedy but flight or patience； though both of them
very hard。 He was； methinks； an understanding fellow who said； 'twas a
happy marriage betwixt a blind wife and a deaf husband。
Let us also consider whether the great and violent severity of obligation
we enjoin them does not produce two effects contrary to our design
namely； whether it does not render the pursuants more eager to attack；
and the women more easy to yield。 For as to the first； by raising the
value of the place； we raise the value and the desire of the conquest。
Might it not be Venus herself； who so cunningly enhanced the price of her
merchandise； by making the laws her bawds； knowing how insipid a delight
it would be that was not heightened by fancy and hardness to achieve？
In short； 'tis all swine's flesh； varied by sauces； as Flaminius' host
said。 Cupid is a roguish god； who makes it his sport to contend with
devotion and justice： 'tis his glory that his power mates all powers； and
that all other rules give place to his：
〃Materiam culpae prosequiturque suae。〃
＇〃And seeks out a matter （motive） for his crimes。〃
Ovid； Trist。； iv。 I。 34。＇
As to the second point； should we not be less cuckolds； if we less feared
to be so？ according to the humour of women whom interdiction incites； and
who are more eager； being forbidden：
〃Ubi velis； nolunt； ubi nolis； volunt ultro；
Concessa pudet ire via。〃
＇〃Where thou wilt； they won't； where thou wilt not； they
spontaneously agree； they are ashamed to go in the permitted path。〃
Terence； Eunuchus； act iv。； sc。 8； v 43＇
What better interpretation can we make of Messalina's behaviour？ She；
at first； made her husband a cuckold in private； as is the common use；
but； bringing her business about with too much ease； by reason of her
husband's st