They've often； often； often seen That Actor off the stage！
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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense
Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense
Those aged men so lean and wan； They've seen it all before； They
know they'll see the charlatan But twice or three times more。
And so they bear with dance and song； And crimson foil and green；
They wearily sit； and grimly long For the Transformation Scene。
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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense
Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense
HAUNTED？ Ay； in a social way By a body of ghosts in dread array；
But no conventional spectres they … Appalling； grim； and tricky： I quail at
mine as I'd never quail At a fine traditional spectre pale； With a turnip
head and a ghostly wail； And a splash of blood on the dickey！
Mine are horrible； social ghosts； … Speeches and women and guests and
hosts； Weddings and morning calls and toasts； In every bad variety： Ghosts
who hover about the grave Of all that's manly； free； and brave： You'll find
their names on the architrave Of that charnel…house； Society。
Black Monday … black as its school…room ink … With its dismal boys
that snivel and think Of its nauseous messes to eat and drink； And its
frozen tank to wash in。 That was the first that brought me grief； And made
me weep； till I sought relief In an emblematical handkerchief； To choke
such baby bosh in。
First and worst in the grim array… Ghosts of ghosts that have gone their
way； Which I wouldn't revive for a single day For all the wealth of
PLUTUS … Are the horrible ghosts that school…days scared： If the classical
ghost that BRUTUS dared Was the ghost of his 〃Caesar〃 unprepared； I'm
sure I pity BRUTUS。
I pass to critical seventeen； The ghost of that terrible wedding scene；
When an elderly Colonel stole my Queen； And woke my dream of heaven。
No schoolgirl decked in her nurse…room curls Was my gushing innocent
Queen of Pearls； If she wasn't a girl of a thousand girls； She was one of
forty…seven！
I see the ghost of my first cigar； Of the thence…arising family jar … Of
my maiden brief （I was at the Bar； And I called the Judge 〃Your wushup！〃）
Of reckless days and reckless nights； With wrenched…off knockers；
extinguished lights； Unholy songs and tipsy fights； Which I strove in vain
to hush up。
Ghosts of fraudulent joint…stock banks； Ghosts of 〃copy； declined with
thanks；〃 Of novels returned in endless ranks； And thousands more； I suffer。
The only line to fitly grace My humble tomb； when I've run my race； Is；
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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense
Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense
I've fought them all； these ghosts of mine； But the weapons I've used
are sighs and brine； And now that I'm nearly forty…nine； Old age is my
chiefest bogy； For my hair is thinning away at the crown； And the silver
fights with the worn…out brown； And a general verdict sets me down As an
irreclaimable fogy。
Footnotes：
（1） A version of this ballad is published as a Song； by Mr。 Jeffreys；
Soho Square。
（2） This ballad is published as a Song； under the title 〃If；〃 by Messrs。
Cramer and Co。
（3） 〃Go with me to a Notary … seal me there Your single bond。〃 MERCHANT
OF VENICE； Act I。； sc。 3。
（4） 〃And there shall she； at Friar Lawrence' cell； Be shrived and
married。〃 … ROMEO AND JULIET； Act II。； sc。 4。
（5） 〃And give the fasting horses provender。〃 … HENRY THE FIFTH；
Act IV。； sc。 2。
（6） 〃Let us； like merchants； show our foulest wares。〃 … TROILUS AND
CRESSIDA； Act I。； sc。 3。
（7） 〃Then must the Jew be merciful。〃 …MERCHANT OF VENICE；
Act IV。； sc。 1。
（8） 〃The spring； the summer； The chilling autumn； angry winter；
change Their wonted liveries。〃 … MIDSUMMER NIGHT DREAM； Act IV。；
sc。 1。
（9） 〃In the county of Glo'ster； justice of the peace and CORAM。〃
MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR； Act I。； sc。 1。
（10） 〃What lusty trumpet thus doth summon us？〃 … KING JOHN； Act
V。； sc。 2。
（11） 〃And I'll provide his executioner。〃 … HENRY THE SIXTH
（Second Part）； Act III。； sc。 1。
（12） 〃The lioness had torn some flesh away； Which all this while had
bled。〃 … AS YOU LIKE IT； Act IV。； sc。 3。
（13） Described by MUNGO PARK。
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Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense
Fifty 〃Bab〃 Ballads … Much Sound and Little Sense
〃Like a bird。〃 … SLANG EXPRESSION。
（15） Reprinted from the 〃The Graphic；〃 by permission of the
proprietors。
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