《lizzie leigh》

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with the fierce impetuosity of one who has none to love her; and to

be beloved; regard to whom might teach self…restraint。



〃Hush!〃 said Susan; her finger on her lips。  〃Here is the doctor。

God may suffer her to live。〃



The poor mother turned sharp round。  The doctor mounted the stair。

Ah! that mother was right; the little child was really dead and gone。



And when he confirmed her judgment; the mother fell down in a fit。

Susan; with her deep grief; had to forget herself; and forget her

darling (her charge for years); and question the doctor what she must

do with the poor wretch; who lay on the floor in such extreme of

misery。



〃She is the mother!〃 said she。



〃Why did she not take better care of her child?〃 asked he; almost

angrily。



But Susan only said; 〃The little child slept with me; and it was I

that left her。〃



〃I will go back and make up a composing draught; and while I am away

you must get her to bed。〃



Susan took out some of her own clothes; and softly undressed the

stiff; powerless form。  There was no other bed in the house but the

one in which her father slept。  So she tenderly lifted the body of

her darling; and was going to take it downstairs; but the mother

opened her eyes; and seeing what she was about; she said〃I am not

worthy to touch her; I am so wicked。  I have spoken to you as I never

should have spoken; but I think you are very good。  May I have my own

child to lie in my arms for a little while?〃



Her voice was so strange a contrast to what it had been before she

had gone into the fit; that Susan hardly recognised it:  it was now

so unspeakably soft; so irresistibly pleading; the features too had

lost their fierce expression; and were almost as placid as death。

Susan could not speak; but she carried the little child; and laid it

in its mother's arms; then; as she looked at them; something

overpowered her; and she knelt down; crying aloud〃Oh; my God; my

God; have mercy on her; and forgive and comfort her。〃



But the mother kept smiling; and stroking the little face; murmuring

soft; tender words; as if it were alive。  She was going mad; Susan

thought; but she prayed on; and on; and ever still she prayed with

streaming eyes。



The doctor came with the draught。  The mother took it; with docile

unconsciousness of its nature as medicine。  The doctor sat by her;

and soon she fell asleep。  Then he rose softly; and beckoning Susan

to the door; he spoke to her there。



〃You must take the corpse out of her arms。  She will not awake。  That

draught will make her sleep for many hours。  I will call before noon

again。  It is now daylight。  Good…by。〃



Susan shut him out; and then; gently extricating the dead child from

its mother's arms; she could not resist making her own quiet moan

over her darling。  She tried to learn off its little placid face;

dumb and pale before her。





Not all the scalding tears of care

Shall wash away that vision fair;

Not all the thousand thoughts that rise;

Not all the sights that dim her eyes;

Shall e'er usurp the place

Of that little angel…face。





And then she remembered what remained to be done。  She saw that all

was right in the house; her father was still dead asleep on the

settle; in spite of all the noise of the night。  She went out through

the quiet streets; deserted still; although it was broad daylight;

and to where the Leighs lived。  Mrs。 Leigh; who kept her country

hours; was opening her window…shutters。  Susan took her by the arm;

and; without speaking; went into the house…place。  There she knelt

down before the astonished Mrs。 Leigh; and cried as she had never

done before; but the miserable night had overpowered her; and she who

had gone through so much calmly; now that the pressure seemed removed

could not find the power to speak。



〃My poor dear!  What has made thy heart so sore as to come and cry a…

this…ons?  Speak and tell me。  Nay; cry on; poor wench; if thou canst

not speak yet。  It will ease the heart; and then thou canst tell me。〃



〃Nanny is dead!〃 said Susan。  〃I left her to go to father; and she

fell downstairs; and never breathed again。  Oh; that's my sorrow!

But I've more to tell。  Her mother is comeis in our house!  Come

and see if it's your Lizzie。〃



Mrs。 Leigh could not speak; but; trembling; put on her things and

went with Susan in dizzy haste back to Crown Street。







CHAPTER IV。







As they entered the house in Crown Street; they perceived that the

door would not open freely on its hinges; and Susan instinctively

looked behind to see the cause of the obstruction。  She immediately

recognised the appearance of a little parcel; wrapped in a scrap of

newspaper; and evidently containing money。  She stooped and picked it

up。  〃Look!〃 said she; sorrowfully; 〃the mother was bringing this for

her child last night。〃



But Mrs。 Leigh did not answer。  So near to the ascertaining if it

were her lost child or no; she could not be arrested; but pressed

onwards with trembling steps and a beating; fluttering heart。  She

entered the bedroom; dark and still。  She took no heed of the little

corpse over which Susan paused; but she went straight to the bed;

and; withdrawing the curtain; saw Lizzie; but not the former Lizzie;

bright; gay; buoyant; and undimmed。  This Lizzie was old before her

time; her beauty was gone; deep lines of care; and; alas! of want (or

thus the mother imagined) were printed on the cheek; so round; and

fair; and smooth; when last she gladdened her mother's eyes。  Even in

her sleep she bore the look of woe and despair which was the

prevalent expression of her face by day; even in her sleep she had

forgotten how to smile。  But all these marks of the sin and sorrow

she had passed through only made her mother love her the more。  She

stood looking at her with greedy eyes; which seemed as though no

gazing could satisfy their longing; and at last she stooped down and

kissed the pale; worn hand that lay outside the bedclothes。  No touch

disturbed the sleeper; the mother need not have laid the hand so

gently down upon the counterpane。  There was no sign of life; save

only now and then a deep sob…like sigh。  Mrs。 Leigh sat down beside

the bed; and still holding back the curtain; looked on and on; as if

she could never be satisfied。



Susan would fain have stayed by her darling one; but she had many

calls upon her time and thoughts; and her will had now; as ever; to

be given up to that of others。  All seemed to devolve the burden of

their cares on her。  Her father; ill…humoured from his last night's

intemperance; did not scruple to reproach her with being the cause of

little Nanny's death; and when; after bearing his upbraiding meekly

for some time; she could no longer restrain herself; but began to

cry; he wounded her even more by his injudicious attempts at comfort;

for he said it was as well the child was dead; it was none of theirs;

and why should they be troubled with it?  Susan wrung her hands at

this; and came and stood before her father; and implored him to

forbear。  Then she had to take all requisite steps for the coroner's

inquest; she had to arrange for the dismissal of her school; she had

to summons a little neighbour; and send his willing feet on a message

to William Leigh; who; she felt; ought to be informed of his mother's

whereabouts; and of the whole state of affairs。  She asked her

messenger to tell him to come and speak to her; that his mother was

at her house。  She was thankful that her father sauntered out to have

a gossip at the nearest coach…stand; and to relate as many of the

night's adventures as he knew; for as yet he was in ignorance of the

watcher and the watched; who silently passed away the hours upstairs。



At dinner…time Will came。  He looked red; glad; impatient; excited。

Susan stood calm and white before him; her soft; loving eyes gazing

straight into his。



〃Will;〃 said she; in a low; quiet voice; 〃your sister is upstairs。〃



〃My sister!〃 said he; as if affrighted at the idea; and losing his

glad look in one of gloom。  Susan saw it; and her heart sank a

little; but she went on as calm to all appearance as ever。



〃She was little Nanny's mother; as perhaps you know。  Poor little

Nanny was killed last night by a fall downstairs。〃  All the calmness

was gone; all the suppressed feeling was displayed in spite of every

effort。  She sat down; and hid her face from him; and cried bitterly。

He forgot everything but the wish; the longing to comfort her。  He

put his arm round her waist; and bent over her。  But all he could

say; was; 〃Oh; Susan; how can I comfort you?  Don't take on sopray

don't!〃  He never changed the words; but the tone varied every time

he spoke。  At last she seemed to regain her power over herself; and

she wiped her eyes; and once more looked upon him with her own quiet;

earnest; unfearing gaze。



〃Your sister was near the house。  Sh
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