my failing； acknowledge it unblushingly； nay； glory in the pride of a noble nature。
For myself； I ask nothing of those who have read my history； to them do I commit my wife and children。 My eldest son is a lieutenant in the Tuscan regiment of cavalry； under General Lasey； and does honour to his father's principles。 The second serves his present Prussian Majesty； as ensign in the Posadowsky dragoons； with equal promise。 The third is still a child。 My daughters will make worthy men happy； for they have imbibed virtue and gentleness with their mother's milk。 Monarchs may hereafter remember what I have suffered； what I have lost； and what is due to my ashes。
Here do I declareI will seek no other revenge against my enemies than that of despising their evil deeds。 It is my wish； and shall be my endeavour； to forget the past； and having committed no offence； neither will I solicit monarchs for posts of honour； as I have ever lived a free man； a free man will I die。
I conclude this part of my history on the evening preceding my journey to Berlin。 God grant I may encounter no new afflictions； to be inserted in the remainder of this history。
This journey I prepared to undertake； but my ever…envious fate threw me on the bed of sickness； insomuch that small hope remained that I ever should again behold the country of my forefathers。 I seemed following the Great Frederic to the mansions of the dead； then should I never have concluded the history of my life； or obtained the victory by which I am now crowned。
A variety of obstacles being overcome； I found it necessary to make a journey into Hungary； which was one of the most pleasant of my whole life。
I have no words to express my ardent wishes for the welfare of a nation where I met with so many proofs of friendship。 Wherever I appeared I was welcomed with that love and enthusiasm which only await the fathers of their country。 The valour of my cousin Trenck； who died ingloriously in the Spielberg； the loss of my great Hungarian estates； the fame of my writings； and the cruelty of my sufferings； had gone before me。 The officers of the army； the nobles of the land； alike testified the warmth of their esteem。
Such is the reward of the upright； such too are the proofs that this nation knows the just value of fortitude and virtue。 Have I not reason to publish my gratitude； and to recommend my children to those who； when I am no more； shall dare uprightly to determine concerning the rights which have unjustly been snatched from me in Hungary？
Not a man in Hungary but will proclaim I have been unjustly dealt by； yet I have good reason to suspect I never shall find redress。 Sentence had been already given； judges； more honest； cannot； without difficulty； reverse old decrees； and the present possessors of my estates are too powerful； too intimate with the governors of the earth； for me to hope I shall hereafter be more happy。 God knows my heart； I wish the present possessors may render services to the state equal to those rendered by the family of the Trencks。
There is little probability I shall ever behold my noble friends in Hungary more。 Here I bid them adieu； promising them to pass the remainder of any life so as still to merit the approbation of a people with whose ashes I would most willingly have mingled my own。 May the God of heaven preserve every Hungarian from a fate similar to mine！
The Croats have ever been reckoned uncultivated； yet； among this uncultivated people I found more subscribers to my writings than among all the learned men of Vienna； and in Hungary； more than in all the Austrian dominions。
The Hungarians； the unlettered Croats； seek information。 The people of Vienna ask their confessors' permission to read instructive books。 Various subscribers； having read the first volume of my work； brought it back； and re…demanded their money； because some monk had told them it was a book dangerous to be read。 The judges of their courts have re…sold them to the booksellers for a few pence or given them to those who had the care of their consciences to burn。
In Vienna alone was my life described as a romance； in Hungary I found the compassion of men； their friendship； and effectual aid。 Had my book been the production of an Englishman； good wishes would not have been his only reward。
We German writers have interested critics to encounter if we would unmask injustice； and if a book finds a rapid sale； dishonest printers issue spurious editions； defrauding the author of his labours。
The encouragement of the learned produces able teachers； and from their seminaries men of genius occasionally come forth。 The world is inundated with books and pamphlets； the undiscerning reader knows not which to select； the more intelligent are disgusted； or do not read at all； and thus a work of merit becomes as little profitable to the author as to the state。
I left Vienna on the 5th of January； and came to Prague。 Here I found nearly the same reception as in Hungary； my writings were read。 Citizens； noblemen； and ladies treated me with like favour。 May the monarch know how to value men of generous feelings and enlarged understandings！
I bade adieu to Prague； and continued my journey to Berlin。 In Bohemia； I took leave of my son； who saw his father and his two brothers； destined for the Prussian service； depart。 He felt the weight of this separation； I reminded him of his duty to the state he served； I spoke of the fearful fate of his uncle and father in Austria； and of the possessors of our vast estates in Hungary。 He shrank backa look from his father pierced him to the soultears stood in his eyeshis youthful blood flowed quick； and the following expression burst suddenly from his lips：… 〃I call God to witness that I will prove myself worthy of my father's name； and that； while I live； his enemies shall be mine！〃
At Peterswald； on the road to Dresden； my carriage broke down： my life was endangered； and my son received a contusion in the arm。 The erysipelas broke out on him at Berlin； and I could not present him to the King for a month after。
I had been but a short time at Berlin before the well…known minister； Count Hertzberg； received me with kindness。 Every man to whom his private worth is known will congratulate the state that has the wisdom to bestow on him so high an office。 His scholastic and practical learning； his knowledge of languages； his acquaintance with sciences； are indeed wonderful。 His zeal for his country is ardent； his love of his king unprejudiced； his industry admirable； his firmness that of a man。 He is the most experienced man in the Prussian states。 The enemies of his country may rely on his word。 The artful he can encounter with art； those who menace； with fortitude； and with wise foresight can avert the rising storm。 He seeks not splendour in sumptuous and ostentatious retinue； but if he can only enrich the state； and behold the poor happy； he is himself willing to remain poor。 His estate； Briess； near Berlin； is no Chanteloup； but a model to those patriots who would study economy。 Here he； every Wednesday； enjoys recreation。 The services he renders the kingdom cost it only five thousand rix…dollars yearly； he； therefore； lives without ostentation； yet becoming his state； and with splendour when splendour is necessary。 He does not plunder the public treasury that he may preserve his own private property。
This man will live in the annals of Prussia： who was employed under the Great Frederic； had so much influence in the cabinets of Europe； and was a witness of the last actions； the last sensations； of his dying king； yet who never asked； nor ever received； the least gratuity。 This is the minister whose conversation I had the happiness to partake at Aix…la…Chapelle and Spa； whose welfare is the wish of my heart； and whose memory I shall ever revere。
I was received with distinction at his table； and became acquainted with those whose science had benefited the Prussian states； nor was anything more flattering to my self…love than that men like these should think me worthy their friendship。
Not many days after I was presented to the court by the Prussian chamberlain； Prince Sacken； as it is not customary at Berlin for a foreign subject to be presented by the minister of his own court。 Though a Prussian subject； I wore the Imperial uniform。
The King received me with condescension； all eyes were directed towards me； each welcomed me to my country。 This moved me the more as it was remarked by the foreign ministers； who asked who that Austrian officer could be who was received with so much affection and such evident joy in Berlin。 The gracious monarch himself gave tokens of pleasure at beholding me thus surrounded。 Among the rest came the worthy General Prittwitz； who said aloud …
〃This is the gentleman who might have ruined me to effect his own deliverance。〃
Confused at so public a declaration； I desired him to expound this riddle； and he added …
〃I was obliged to be one of your guards on your unfortunate journey from Dantzic to Magdeburg； in 1754； when I was a lieutenant。 On the road I continued alone with you in an open carriage。 This gave you an opportunity to escape； but you forbore。