He shook his head。 〃Not tonight； ma petite。 I knew you would feel this way； and we can try and release her； though I have poor hope for it。〃
〃What's that supposed to mean？〃
〃She was not the most stable of women when she went in。 This will not have strengthened her grasp of reality。〃
〃How could you have done this to her？〃
〃I told you before； ma petite； she earned her punishment。〃
〃Not three years；〃 I said。 My voice was beginning to sound normal again。 I wasn't going to hit him； great。
〃Three years for nearly killing you。 I could leave her in for three more years； and it would not be punishment enough。〃
〃I'm not going to argue whether the punishment was justified or excessive； or anything。 All I can say is that I want her out of there。 I won't let her stay in there another night。 There's barely anything left now。〃
He glanced at the coffin。 〃You have not opened it； how do you know what is inside？〃
〃I wanted to know how Damian was。 I used a little magic to explore what was inside both coffins。〃
〃And what did you discover？〃 he asked。
〃That my necromancy recognizes Damian。 That Damian isn't there。 It's like his personality is missing。 Whatever made him； him； is missing。〃
Jean…Claude nodded。 〃With the vampires that are not master strength and never will be； it is often the Master of the City； or their creator； that enables them to exist as strong presences。 Cut off from that； they often fade。〃
Fade； he called it； like he was talking about curtains that had been in sunlight too long； instead of a living being。 Well； a sort…of…living being。
〃Well； Gretchen is way past faded。 There's almost nothing left。 We leave her in even one more night and she may not be there。〃
〃She cannot die。〃
〃Maybe not； but the damage 。。。 〃 I shook my head。 〃We have to get her out now； tonight； or we might as well put a bullet in her。〃
〃Leave Damian in for one more night； and I will agree to release Gretchen。〃
〃No；〃 I said。 〃Damian is like one of those feral vamps。 The longer he's like this； the greater the likelihood that he'll never be anything else。〃
〃Do you really believe that one more night will damage him irreparably？〃 Jean…Claude asked。
〃I don't know； but I know that if I wait until tomorrow night to get him out and the damage is permanent； I'll always wonder if that one extra night made the difference。〃
〃Then we have a problem； ma petite。 A hot bath is being run now in preparation for one released vampire。 We only have one place suitable here at the Circus for such a recovery。〃
〃Why a bath？〃 I asked。
〃They must be brought back to life； to warmth。 The process must be done carefully； or the risk is one of true death。〃
〃Wait a minute。 A vamp can be in the coffin locked away forever and never die； but getting them out can kill them？ That doesn't make sense。〃
〃They have adjusted to the coffin； ma petite。 To bring them out after a length of time is a shock to their system。 I have seen vampires die of it。〃
I knew he wouldn't lie； he was too unhappy about having to say it。 〃So we throw them both in the same tub； no big。〃
〃But it is a big； ma petite。 The attention and power needed to bring one back must not be divided between them。 It will take all that I have to bring one at a time back。 I cannot divide my efforts without risking them both。〃
〃I know that you made Gretchen； but you didn't make Damian。 His ties to you as Master of the City broke when he became mine； so you aren't his master in any way。 I am。〃
〃Yes；〃 he said。
〃Then isn't it my job to bring Damian back my mystical connection with him； not yours？〃
〃If you were truly his master； another vampire； I would agree。 But you are； for all your talents； still human。 There are things you cannot do for him； and there are many things you will not know to do for him。〃
〃Like what？〃
He shook his head。 〃It is a plex process； requiring specialized skills。〃
〃And you have those skills；〃 I said。
〃Do not sound so skeptical； ma petite。 I was part of our mistress's emergency 。。。 crew；〃 he said。 〃She would punish others and we would be left to deal with the aftermath。 It was often her way。〃
〃We？〃 I asked。
〃Asher and myself。〃
〃So Asher knows how to do this；〃 I said。
〃Oui； but he is not Damian's master either。〃
〃No； but I am。 If Damian still has one； I'm it。 So you take care of Gretchen； you loan me Asher； and he tells me what to do for Damian。〃
〃After his little display in the other room； you would trust him？〃
〃I'd trust him with my life； and so would you。〃
〃But not our hearts；〃 Jean…Claude said。
〃Why did it bother him so much to see you with Micah？〃 I asked。 〃He's seen almost as bad with Richard； and me。〃
〃I believe that you as my human servant and Richard as my wolf to call were possessions； mine by right； and you were already in place when Asher arrived in St。 Louis。 Micah is not my animal to call。 He has no ties directly to me。 He is your Nimir…Raj； but nothing to me。〃
〃And？〃 I asked。
〃Asher was willing to share me with you and Richard because you were mine； but this Nimir…Raj is simply another man that has my favor when Asher does not。〃
〃Micah doesn't have your favor； exactly； yet。〃
Jean…Claude gave a small smile。 〃True； but Asher does not see it that way。〃
〃If it weren't for my 。。。 social qualms would you be doing Asher right now？〃
He laughed； an abrupt sound that didn't dance along my body； it just filled his face with glee。 The closest I'd ever seen to real laughter from him。 〃Social qualms ah； ma petite； that is precious。〃
I frowned at him。 〃Just answer the question。〃
The laughter faded； almost like a person； instead of that abrupt change he usually did。 〃Asher and I would likely have e to an understanding if it would not have cost me you； ma petite。〃
〃An understanding。 Now who's being coy？〃 I said。
He gave that Gallic shrug that meant everything and nothing。 〃You would not be fortable with brutal honesty； ma petite。〃
〃Fine； if I could have stomached it； would you have taken Asher back as your lover by now？〃
He thought about it； then finally； 〃I do not know； ma petite。〃
〃I know you love him。〃
〃Oui； but that does not mean we could be lovers again。 When he and I were happiest； it was with Julianna。 You might be able to stand us as lovers out of your sight； as long as we did not act like lovers in front of you。 I do not think you would like watching Asher and me hold hands in front of you。〃
Put that way； he was right。 〃What are you saying？〃
〃I am saying that Asher deserves better than a hidden relationship where we could never show public affection for fear of hurting you。 I would rather give him up pletely to someone else； male or female； than force him to play second or lower to you forever。〃
I opened my mouth to say that I liked Asher； even loved him in a way； but I didn't； because I didn't want to raise the possibility of a true ménage à trois。 What I'd seen with Micah and Jean…Claude had already bugged me a lot。 I just couldn't deal with two men and me。 Yeah； yeah； it was the Midwestern； middle…class value system； but it was the way I looked at the world。 I couldn't change that； could I？ And if I could； did I want to？
I didn't know。 I just didn't know。 The fact that the thought didn't make me run screaming into the night bothered me； but not as much as I thought it should have。
54
JEAN…CLAUDE GAVE JASON the keys to the locks on the silver chains。 He'd spent the last hour explaining everyone's job。 Jason would be the appetizer； oh sorry； Gretchen's first feeding。 It couldn't be someone human because the first feeding after being in the box could be quite 。。。 traumatic。 Jean…Claude's choice of words； not mine。 So basically Jason got to be point man and take the first damage。 Then it was Jean…Claude's turn to donate blood。 The vamp's master gave a feeding and rebound the vamp to the blood oaths that connected them either to the Master of the City； their bloodline； their maker； or； in Jean…Claude's case； all three。 All three was better； the stronger the original connection； the greater chance the vampire had of healing the damage。
That last part made me worry for Damian。 I wasn't his maker； I wasn't his bloodline； or his Master of the City。 I wasn't sure exactly what I was to him。 To that question； Jean…Claude had said； 〃You are his master； ma petite。 Whatever that means for a necromancer； that is what you are to him。 If taking blood from you doesn't reconnect him； then Asher will try。 Failing that； they will fetch me from Gretchen。 Damian must rebind his ties to one of us； or he is lost。〃
〃Define lost；〃 I said。
〃The madness may be permanent。〃
〃Shit。〃
〃Oui。〃
But first Gretchen； so that I could see it done； understand the process better。
Jason unlocked the chains。 They fell off the coffin and clunked against the wood； a dull； harsh sound。 It made me jump。 Gretchen had tried to kill me when she only thought I was dating Jean…Claude。 She might rise from the coffin bent on killing me。 I'd been her advocate； demanding Jean…Claude let her out。 Now as Jason undid the locks on the lid itself； my chest was tight； and I had to fight to keep my hand away from my gun。 It would be stupid not to mention ironic if