circumstances the boy would have been able to lie； and would have
lied accordingly。
〃There is no occasion for you to send your child to a deformatory。
I am always averse to extreme measures when I can avoid them。
Moreover； in a deformatory she would be almost certain to fall in
with characters as intractable as her own。 Take her home and whip
her next time she so much as pulls about the salt。 If you will do
this whenever you get a chance； I have every hope that you will
have no occasion to come to me again。〃
〃Very well； sir；〃 said the father； 〃I will do my best； but the
child is so instinctively truthful that I am afraid whipping will
be of little use。〃
There were other cases； none of them serious； which in the old days
would have been treated by a straightener。 My father had already
surmised that the straightener had become extinct as a class；
having been superseded by the Managers and Cashiers of the Musical
Banks； but this became more apparent as he listened to the cases
that next came on。 These were dealt with quite reasonably； except
that the magistrate always ordered an emetic and a strong purge in
addition to the rest of his sentence； as holding that all diseases
of the moral sense spring from impurities within the body； which
must be cleansed before there could be any hope of spiritual
improvement。 If any devils were found in what passed from the
prisoner's body； he was to be brought up again； for in this case
the rest of the sentence might very possibly be remitted。
When the Mayor and his coadjutors had done sitting； my father
strolled round the Musical Bank and entered it by the main
entrance； which was on the top of a flight of steps that went down
on to the principal street of the town。 How strange it is that； no
matter how gross a superstition may have polluted it； a holy place；
if hallowed by long veneration； remains always holy。 Look at
Delphi。 What a fraud it was； and yet how hallowed it must ever
remain。 But letting this pass； Musical Banks； especially when of
great age； always fascinated my father； and being now tired with
his walk； he sat down on one of the many rush…bottomed seats； and
（for there was no service at this hour） gave free rein to
meditation。
How peaceful it all was with its droning old…world smell of
ancestor； dry rot； and stale incense。 As the clouds came and went；
the grey…green； cobweb…chastened； light ebbed and flowed over the
walls and ceiling； to watch the fitfulness of its streams was a
sufficient occupation。 A hen laid an egg outside and began to
cackleit was an event of magnitude； a peasant sharpening his
scythe； a blacksmith hammering at his anvil； the clack of a wooden
shoe upon the pavement； the boom of a bumble…bee； the dripping of
the fountain； all these things； with such concert as they kept；
invited the dewy…feathered sleep that visited him； and held him for
the best part of an hour。
My father has said that the Erewhonians never put up monuments or
write epitaphs for their dead； and this he believed to be still
true； but it was not so always； and on waking his eye was caught by
a monument of great beauty； which bore a date of about 1550 of our
era。 It was to an old lady； who must have been very loveable if
the sweet smiling face of her recumbent figure was as faithful to
the original as its strongly marked individuality suggested。 I
need not give the earlier part of her epitaph； which was
conventional enough； but my father was so struck with the
concluding lines； that he copied them into the note…book which he
always carried in his pocket。 They ran：…
I fall asleep in the full and certain hope
That my slumber shall not be broken；
And that though I be all…forgetting；
Yet shall I not be all…forgotten；
But continue that life in the thoughts and deeds
Of those I loved；
Into which； while the power to strive was yet vouchsafed me；
I fondly strove to enter。
My father deplored his inability to do justice to the subtle
tenderness of the original； but the above was the nearest he could
get to it。
How different this from the opinions concerning a future state
which he had tried to set before the Erewhonians some twenty years
earlier。 It all came back to him； as the storks had done； now that
he was again in an Erewhonian environment； and he particularly
remembered how one youth had inveighed against our European notions
of heaven and hell with a contemptuous flippancy that nothing but
youth and ignorance could even palliate。
〃Sir；〃 he had said to my father； 〃your heaven will not attract me
unless I can take my clothes and my luggage。 Yes； and I must lose
my luggage and find it again。 On arriving； I must be told that it
has unfortunately been taken to a wrong circle； and that there may
be some difficulty in recovering itor it shall have been sent up
to mansion number five hundred thousand millions nine hundred
thousand forty six thousand eight hundred and eleven； whereas it
should have gone to four hundred thousand millions； &c。； &c。； and
am I sure that I addressed it rightly？ Then； when I am just
getting cross enough to run some risk of being turned out； the
luggage shall make its appearance； hat…box； umbrella； rug； golf…
sticks； bicycle； and everything else all quite correct； and in my
delight I shall tip the angel double and realise that I am enjoying
myself。
〃Or I must have asked what I could have for breakfast； and be told
I could have boiled eggs； or eggs and bacon； or filleted plaice。
'Filleted plaice；' I shall exclaim； 'no！ not that。 Have you any
red mullets？' And the angel will say； 'Why no； sir； the gulf has
been so rough that there has hardly any fish come in this three
days； and there has been such a run on it that we have nothing left
but plaice。'
〃'Well； well；' I shall say； 'have you any kidneys？'
〃'You can have one kidney； sir'； will be the answer。
〃'One kidney； indeed； and you call this heaven！ At any rate you
will have sausages？'
〃'Then the angel will say； 'We shall have some after Sunday； sir；
but we are quite out of them at present。'
〃And I shall say； somewhat sulkily； 'Then I suppose I must have
eggs and bacon。'
〃But in the morning there will come up a red mullet； beautifully
cooked； a couple of kidneys and three sausages browned to a turn；
and seasoned with just so much sage and thyme as will savour
without overwhelming them； and I shall eat everything。 It shall
then transpire that the angel knew about the luggage； and what I
was to have for breakfast； all the time； but wanted to give me the
pleasure of finding things turn out better than I had expected。
Heaven would be a dull place without such occasional petty false
alarms as these。〃
I have no business to leave my father's story； but the mouth of the
ox that treadeth out the corn should not be so closely muzzled that
he cannot sometimes filch a mouthful for himself； and when I had
copied out the foregoing somewhat irreverent paragraphs； which I
took down （with no important addition or alteration） from my
father's lips； I could not refrain from making a few reflections of
my own； which I will ask the reader's forbearance if I lay before
him。
Let heaven and hell alone； but think of Hades； with Tantalus；
Sisyphus； Tityus； and all the rest of them。 How futile were the
attempts of the old Greeks and Romans to lay before us any
plausible conception of eternal torture。 What were the Danaids
doing but that which each one of us has to do during his or her
whole life？ What are our bodies if not sieves that we are for ever
trying to fill； but which we must refill continually without hope
of being able to keep them full for long together？ Do we mind
this？ Not so long as we can get the wherewithal to fill them； and
the Danaids never seem to have run short of water。 They would
probably ere long take to clearing out any obstruction in their
sieves if they found them getting choked。 What could it matter to
them whether the sieves got full or no？ They were not paid for
filling them。
Sisyphus； again！ Can any one believe that he would go on rolling
that stone year after year and seeing it roll down again unless he
liked seeing it？ We are not told that there was a dragon which
attacked him whenever he tried to shirk。 If he had greatly cared
about getting his load over the last pinch； experience would have
shown him some way of doing so。 The probability is that he got to
enjoy the downward rush of his stone； and very likely amused
himself by so timing it as to cause the greatest scare to the
greatest number of the shades that were below。
What though Tantalus found the water shun him and the fruits fly
from him when he tried to seize them？ The writer of the 〃Odyssey〃
gives us no hint that he was dying of thirst or hunger。 The pores
of his skin would absorb enough water to prevent the first； and we
may be sure that he got fruit enough； one way or another； to keep
him going。
Tityus； as an effort after the conception of an eternity of
torture； is not successful。 What could an eagle matter on the
liver of a man whose body covered nine acres？ Before long he would
find it an agreeable stimulant。 If； then； the greatest min